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In my last year of theological school, I enrolled in a black theology
seminar. Five of us met weekly in Dr. Rook’s living room and wrestled with
James Cone’s writings. One moment now stands out in my memory. After reading
"God of the Oppressed," one student, a slight, intense, dark-haired man,
said, "When I look at my white skin in the mirror in the morning I hate
myself." I remember the discussion of theology came to a halt. I felt pity
for him. I expressed my concern that nothing good could come of self-hatred.
I don’t recall that a resolution was reached, but I had witnessed how hard
the burden of guilt is to bear.
When later in 1978 I graduated from
Meadville Lombard Theological School, my doctoral thesis was entitled "Black
Pioneers in a White Denomination." Writing it has been a survival tactic. If
I was going to become a minister in this overwhelmingly Euro-American
religious association, I wanted to know why I had so few black colleagues. I
set out to interview them or their kin. Ethelred Brown’s daughter. Thom
Payne, David Eaton, Lewis McGee, Mwalimu Imara, Ben Richardson and Jeff
Campbell. One by one I tracked them down, yet the name of William H.G.
Carter was never mentioned.
Carter’s existence was brought to my
attention a year later. Felix Lion, one of my senior colleagues in upstate
New York, pulled me aside one day to tell me how in 1938 while studying in
Cincinnati he’d accidentally come across the Unitarian Brotherhood Church.
Besides his surprise, what he remembered most was "the warm, motherly
figure, Mrs. Carter."
Four years later, as I was reworking
"Black Pioneers" for publication, I tried to find out more about Carter. I
wrote Lon Ray Call, who had visited the congregation on behalf of the AUA in
1939. Call replied. Forty years and old age had erased all memory of his
visit but he said, "Sorry if I kept a good man from fulfilling his mission."
It seems that as he penned his note explaining that Unitarianism was in
serious decline, Call experienced feelings of guilt and was moved to
apologize.
If we surveyed the situation of black
ministers at that moment in 1939, this is what we would have found: Egbert
Ethelred Brown, who had transferred his efforts from Jamaica to Harlem in
1920, had his ministerial fellowship reinstated several years earlier after
the ACLU threatened to sue the American Unitarian Association. It has been
revoked in 1929, which was the same year that Brown’s eldest son had
committed suicide and one AUA official had written to another: "No wonder
his son committed suicide, he must have been the only wise one in the
family."
Lewis McGee was two years away from
becoming a member of the Board of the American Humanist Association. A
Unitarian minister had counseled him in 1927, "If you want to become a
Unitarian minister, you had better bring your own church," and so in ’39 he
was still serving African Methodist Episcopal churches in the Chicago
region.
Jeff Campbell, a Universalist, who in 1938
also gained fellowship as a Unitarian, told me that Frederick May Eliot
"would start making excuses as soon as he saw me at the other end of the
corridor." In Unitarian circles it didn’t speak well for him that he’d also
run as the gubernatorial candidate in Massachusetts as a Socialist. It would
be another 30 years before he would be settled.
Meanwhile there was W.H.G. Carter who,
like Brown, was a community activist and, like Campbell and Brown, ran for
office, but unlike any of them he was also an entrepreneur. He had been a
Unitarian since 1918 and was ministering to a congregation of 50-60 in a
Cincinnati storefront at 732 West 5th St. The local Unitarian
ministers knew of his stature and work, but not a word had been passed on to
headquarters in Boston until that fateful afternoon that Felix Lion saw the
sign that read "The Unitarian Brotherhood Church."
So, in 1938, there were four black
Unitarian ministers in the U.S.: men of substance, each struggling on in
isolation. There were two black Unitarian churches, one here and the other
in Harlem, unknown to one another and receiving minimal or no support from
the AUA. It seems Unitarian attitudes had changed little since 1860, when an
African-American, the Rev. Mr. Jackson, had presented himself to the
autumnal meeting of the Boston Unitarian ministers. He told of his
conversion and it is minuted that they took a collection and sent him on his
way. "No discussion, no welcome, no expression of praise and satisfaction
was uttered, that the Unitarian gospel had reached the ‘colored.’"
Like the Rev. Mr. Jackson, what Carter,
Brown, McGee, Campbell and others that followed them experienced instead of
an "expression of praise and satisfaction" was, at best, official
indifference and often-active discouragement. The experience of the other
black Unitarian ministers was so discouraging that I can’t help but wonder
if it was not just as well that William H.G. Carter only had the one
interaction with Boston.
As Unitarian Universalists we can look
back upon these squandered opportunities with regret. Realizing how our
forebears abused the black men who came to us in faith, it is easy to feel
guilty. No longer shielded by ignorance, shame is what I feel. I know. I’ve
felt it, I assume we all have, and know also how it eats away at our
self-esteem. What are we to do with the guilt that burdens us?
During a genealogical presentation at a
family reunion, when my cousin said Elizabeth Hardcastle had left her niece
Catherine Cleveland, my great-great-great-great-grandmother, five slaves, my
mind snapped to attention. I had suspected this but never focused my
attention upon it because I didn’t want to know. Feelings of confusion and
shame gripped me as I sat there. We were African-Americans and slave owners
both? I waited. Would my cousin say something more? When I asked, she
prevaricated. "These were the oldest slaves," she explained. "They were
given to Catherine because she would care for them." The cynic in me
snarled. The "Boy Scout" hoped it was true. Torn, I remained silent as the
presentation wandered elsewhere. What I wanted was for the lecture to stop.
I needed to ponder the moral implications and shift through what it made me
feel. I was comfortable identifying myself as a victim of slavery—my
father’s maternal grandmother had been freed at age four, and I had known
her. What I was unprepared emotionally to incorporate was the fact that I
also had ancestors who were slave owners.
Obviously Catherine Cleveland had
prospered in South Carolina. Slavery had served us well. I blush as I say
this but one look around the hotel banquet hall was all that was required to
remind me how much we had profited: a judge, an ambassador, a brokerage
house vice-president, a bank manager, the medical director of an insurance
company, mingling with physicians and lawyers, teachers, dentists and social
workers. How was I to respond to this reality that some of the advantages
that have been mine are the fruit of an institution I had always considered
an abomination? How was I to respond to the fact that my family and I were
indebted to such a past? Since then I have come to see that my situation
parallels that of white Americans and UUs. They—you—we haven’t known how to
deal with the inequities of the past any more than I did. Who can tolerate
knowing that one of the pillars of one’s prosperity is a great evil? The
burden of guilt is not easily borne, but what to do about it?
Tell the truth. America was no empty
frontier waiting to be settled by Europeans. That fabrication helps us evade
a painful reality. The "American Wilderness" was a moral one: the genocide
of Native Americans, compounded by the enslavement of kidnapped Africans.
Slavery was written into a "Constitution" which we deem a sacred document
designed to defend freedom. This was not incongruent, for that freedom
ironically was never meant for any besides white, land-owning males. The
ideal, however, was greater than the white men who articulated it. Once the
notion of freedom was in the air it could not be contained. The
"Emancipation Proclamation" set the slaves free. The economic bondage and
attenuation of political rights imposed by America’s caste system only
delayed freedom. Even "Jim Crow" could not stop it—the unfinished revolution
continued, and continues still although many no longer notice.
This places us in a conundrum. White
people, in general, are blind to the subtle forms of discrimination that
black Americans bitterly consider ordinary. It’s hard to notice the
cumulative advantage that goes with one’s place in society, and it is more
likely that Euro-Americans experience themselves as the victims of today’s
society. In this context, to ask white people—no matter how good their
intentions—to take responsibility for their ancestors’ misdeeds and
injustice is to create expectations that will never be met. To ask them to
change is to place the onus upon those who have little understanding and
less motivation. To hold out hope that they will change can only create more
bitterness, since whites, regardless of what efforts are made, will fall
short of what we who are black hope for, once again leaving us disappointed
and angry.
So what are we to do? William F. Schulz,
former president of the UUA, wrote in the preface to Black Pioneers in a
White Denomination, "It calls upon us to transcend both apathy and guilt
because both deal cruelly with vision." Vision is the key.
Which is to say the past was what it was,
but we can transcend it. To transcend it we must transform it, and
transforming it requires a process of healing. People begin to heal when
they give voice to their stories and have their pain acknowledged. In the
realization of how ugly, uncomfortable and messy our past is, denial is a
compelling choice. But denial of past wrongs only perpetuates them for it
says, "We do not see you, recognize the injustice nor understand your pain."
This is also what happens when people say, "Let’s forget the past and look
toward the future." As Leslie Edwards observed, "You can say, ‘The right
thing wasn’t done back then and I wasn’t (there) back then, so I’m going to
go ahead and forget about it. The past is the past.’ Or you can say, ‘If
there is anything I can do to recognize (that) what was done in the past was
wrong, I want to acknowledge it and step forward and do what I can.’"
Ultimately, we can’t move toward reconciliation until the pain has been
spoken of and listened to.
Healing begins by accepting the truth
about what happened back then. Recognize it, regret it, grieve it, accept it
and move on. Our regrets about the past are, in part, what bring us here
today. Shed tears for how we treated William H.G. Carter. Grieve the lost
opportunity. Grieve that we did not live up to our principles which affirm
the inherent worth and dignity of every person, and were not true to our
Judeo-Christian heritage which calls on us to "love thy neighbor as
thyself." Reconciliation, as they have discovered in South Africa, requires
truth. That is what this weekend is in part about—reconciliation. It asks
that we pause to remember the history we would rather forget.
Remembering the past with regret can
strengthen the resolve to do the only thing we can do—together to shape a
more just tomorrow. For in that moment when the one person feels hurt and
the other feels sympathy, a bond is established. That connection can be
built upon. And as the relationship grows, we can move beyond avoidance,
guilt and self-hatred, and let go of the anger and recrimination to embrace
the only things that can sustain us over the long haul – the love of God,
which we find in one another, and our shared vision of tomorrow. For alone,
our vision is too narrow to see all that must be seen, and our strength too
limited to do all that must be done, but together our vision widens and our
strength is renewed, and that is cause, as it is today, to celebrate and
recommit with our souls.
Let us pray:
Dear God dwelling within, among and beyond
us all we come to you with furrowed brow and shoulders bent to share news of
our frustration and failures and our hope, for we are still searching –
searching our hearts for that place that knows we are one human family,
searching the world for companions with whom to share in our work, searching
for a way that will lead us forward into a tomorrow blessed by words of
reconciliation spoken today.
Amen.
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